Hi,guys.So how's everyone?Ditching my blog for a looong time shows more than enough that I am really really busy and I'm sorry for that.I'm going to write a full-length text here because I have so many things to confess.First of all,my first semester's exam.I didn't manage to pass it,and this exceeds.I cried a lot because of that,but still I wake up in the morning and moved on,afterall,life goes on,right?I have no reason to give up--no,not yet.School has been hard on me and I'm barely hanging on.This year taught me a lot of lesson ( though I was supposed to say this when 2014 is almost over but who cares ) I learnt the meaning of true friendship,the real definition of stress & struggles.Unlike smart students,I'd only get good grades if I really work on it.
Before I sat for PT3,my aunt told me that I have to be fully prepared,nervous at first is a normal thing.But who expects what kind of question would came out,and I don't want to deny that the exam is not compatible with me and I am not capable enough to sit for it.After sitting for maths' paper,I cried.That time,I was already expecting a failure.But right before the school ends,we received our test papers back and my marks was higher than usual ( not to brag ) I nearly shed my tears.People said expect the unexpected and yes I did.I was expecting a failure but it didn't turn out to be a failure and I am really really grateful for it.Thank you,Allah.
I feel like my hardworks is paid off,eventhough its kinda disappointing to my parents but despite my struggles,sleepless night and days,I finally know how does it feels like to be paid off and I deserve this,results usually depends on how far we could go for it.
Next is friendship.Thank you to my five sisters,without them,I will never be able to hold on for this long.They're like my spine;without my spine,I won't be able to stand up.They listened to me when I have no one to talk to,the ones who stayed when things get hard,the ones who never gave up on me no matter how ugly I may act.
To be honest,yes friendship issues does occur sometimes and it does happens to us.But we managed to go through it well I admit that when one of us has a boyfriend,friends will definitely get ditched and I'm totally pissed with it.Because of that too,we rarely talk in group chat.Sometimes the group chat would be so quiet for a couple of days and weeks if one of us didn't start a conversation.I don't get it why this kind of thing would happen to us,it disappoints me alot seeing their attitude.
It feels like I am the only one who can't live without them but they're totally fine without me.Yes it does feels that way.I know this would end someday,I hope so.I swear I don't wanna get sad over things like this.
This year has also taught me how to be a good listener/advisor (not to brag but my friends said so) I tried to be there for anyone if they desperately needs someone to talk to.But being a good listener somehow makes me question myself; why am I so good in advising people while I suck at handling my own problems?
2014 is a year that made me go through everything.I don't know how did I even survived;thank god cause I did hehehe.Maybe this is another part of growing up;yes I'm growing up.Being the oldest among my sisters have also taught me to be more matured.Its okay if I get hurt as long as I won't hurt anybody.
Thank you for everything,guys.I won't be able to make it if I wasn't surrounded with this kind of people.Thanks a lot.
-neesa
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